The 1 in 3 women Debate.

I am a college-aged female who attends a top university. I was raped. Of my closest female friends (I have 8 friends I could call "close"), 3 of them have been sexually assaulted. One happened while abroad, one happened when she was really drunk and two guys had their way with her, and another happened when my friend was drunk and eventually she managed to get the guy off of her. So out of 9 girls (including myself), 4 of us have been sexually assaulted. It's a small sample size, but it's the group that those surveys target. NONE of my friends came right out and told me about it--many waited months to tell me. Some tried to forget about it while it nearly destroyed others.

What I'm trying to say is that you're not going to have college women coming up to you saying, "The weather's really nice today, oh, and by the way, I was raped!"

We live in a country/culture that tells women, "You can do everything men do! Be independent! Enjoy your life!" But at the same time, many women end up in undesirable situations because they trusted the men around them to do the right thing. It turns out there are plenty of men out there who are completely selfish and devoid of empathy.

Imagine having your sense of safety entirely shattered. Situations that previously felt completely safe now feel questionable--should I be alone with a man in this room? Is it safe to drive home with this guy? etc etc. When a woman is raped, often her first reaction is just to give the attacker what he wants so that no worse harm will come to her. It's self-preservation. Imagine giving up your bodily integrity so that someone won't kill you. Then imagine trying to go through life imagining that everything is normal.

Every case of sexual assault is different--some are worse than others. Women (and men) react to sexual assault in a number of different ways.

If you saw me on the street, you'd probably think, "There's a cute girl." I'm in shape; I have friends; I study; I go to parties; I laugh and have a good time. From the outside you wouldn't immediately think, "She was raped." Not all of us are outwardly walking around like zombies. Rape doesn't (usually) leave a permanent mark that people can see for the rest of our lives.

But the fact still remains that I was raped, and for over a year I spent most nights crying into my pillow and trying to forget that night. I've found that the only way out is through. I don't want to discuss what happened to me on a public stage because I don't want to be defined by what happened to me by an audience of my peers. That's the culture we live in today. White, middle class, pretty, by all means the picture of what a successful daughter should be... but this still happened to me. It could happen to anyone. You need to believe us.

/r/PurplePillDebate Thread