Do we really know anything about the long lived Dwarf or Elf raise their young? You have only a human perspective and want to apply that to every fantasy race you meet. They are an alien race, human norms do not apply.

Do we know how the Elves raise their young or educate their youth? Maybe they spend that whole time in a Hibernation or grow on stalks and their parents have to wait until they ripen and fall from their pods! Could take all of 40 years for that to happen?

Dwarves, again we cannot assume that they give birth to their young then go through the change diapers, learn to walk, them grab a hammer and start working the mines. Who really knows what these alien races do that whole time they are aging. Maybe for the youthful dwarf they spend their formative years studying slopes in underground hallways, drink beer and mead until their elders are sure they are not going to embarrass themselves at a party? They may not be allowed culturally or mature enough physically to learn hammer and axe until they reach a certain maturity.

When we apply a human perspective to these races you essentially lose what makes them unique. To a human meeting an 80 year old Elf, we might think they spent that whole time, studying magic, shooting arrows and learning the ways of the forest, but this may not be the case at all, it is just a human perspective of an alien race.