For Indians who cannot read this

So, apparently India's Department of Telecommunications is banning ~850 sites for being "too porn-ish". Their words, not mine. (My words). Somehow, our site was one of the ones deemed pornographic. Now that technically a huge percentage of the world can't see CollegeHumor's stuff, who are we to continuously fact-check all of the Indian trivia we post on our website? Here are some facts that I made up about technically-my-home-country.

Geographically, India borders Texas.

Between early 1996 and later 1996, India's government was run successfully by one yeti.

India does not recognize the month of February. That month is just called, "January Mourning."

The song, "I'm Your Baby Tonight" by Whitney Houston was based on an old Sanskrit saying, since Sanskrit was Whitney Houston's first language.

I have been to India eighty times.

Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi's name is an anagram for, "I will be Prime Minister" which is amazing because that is exactly what he became.

India goes by the metric system not because it's easier, but because it is in direct opposition to the imperial system and India is currently going through a "bad boy phase".

Every Indian citizen is ambidextrous when it comes to drawing self portraits, but is strictly right handed when it comes to drawing anyone's portraits.

I am right about everything.

Ralph Nader owns three time-shares in all of India. No one knows what he shares this time with, but I have my theories.

Sanskrit is not a dead language - it is just kept secret from some.

India's biggest export since 1924 is the VHS copy of Celine Dion: Live in Memphis