No, that's fine, you were giving advice that would have worked for a normal person.

Abuse can be in many forms:

• sexual (e.g. forcing someone to have sex with you, controlling when you have sex, withdrawing to humiliate the partner, coercion, not taking responsibility for contraception, touching without consent)
• physical (hitting, slapping, choking, shoving, flicking, any physical actions that the other person dislikes or is hurt by, throwing things around)
• verbal (humiliation, degradation, swearing, comparison, calling someone with pet names to remove their identity, insulting in front of people)
• psychological (lying, calling someone crazy, denying something happened, making someone question their reality, hiding things to confuse someone, insulting someone then saying it was a joke, undermining someone's feelings, stopping someone from sleeping)
• financial (preventing a person from working, not letting them have their own money, controlling how money is spent, having access to all their finances, reading bank statements)
• control can also be constantly calling someone, checking someone's phone, interrogating you on your whereabouts, blackmailing and threats.

My ex husband did all of that minus punches and kicks.

The sister mentioned how he forced her into the shower and screamed at her until she cried to 'train' her into being a good wife. He told her after 21 she's useless and no man will ever want her. Constantly calls her and she has to pick up asap no matter how inconvenient it is. He seeks her out to make sure she is exactly where she says. All of this is abuse.