Hey thanks for the thoughtful reply. There are a lot of details I didn't put into my post regarding why exactly I like this person because I wanted to address the main issue.

For anyone reading this, I like him because he's physically, my ideal type of person. Ideal height, weight, body type, has nice style, dresses well, all of that good stuff. It's hard to let go of someone you can't take your eyes off of.

Secondly, we share similar interests, hobbies, and values. We both like video games and it's our main way of "hanging out" I guess you can say, since when we play Overwatch and stuff together it's a bonding experience. We both like to travel, have a desire to see new places internationally, have similar political values, and for the most part we get along well. We have a bundle of inside jokes and we both agree that we're best friends.

But I can't shake all of my fears and anxieties which makes me question if I'm making a big deal out of something that is very simple. I'm afraid he'll go behind my back again. I'm afraid he doesn't have self control. I'm afraid he'll find someone better. I'm afraid he'll leave, or he'll stop talking to me, all of this stuff. Sometimes I think what you said is true. I question my purpose all of the time. Does he truly enjoy my company? Are we really as close as I think? I just feel like if he really felt the same way he'd at least attempt long distance with me. And I know this sub has basically a solid opinion on LDRs and that they do not work. But I would rather let distance separate us the way it did with my last LDR than feel like I'm breaking up with someone I never even got to be with.

I'm just hopeful and very scared, and for these reasons I've dug myself into this hole.