[1988] Book of Ruin Ch.6

Overall: Cool. I'm into this. Appreciated the chapter summaries too. The plot has me hooked. By the end of the chapter, I was completely zoned into the story. I'd read the full story (well maybe not anymore, since it's been a bit spoiled :P).

Syntax and flow was very good, easy to follow and imagine in my head for the most part. Descriptions are very good, not too much, not too little, not too complicated, and not too simple.

I liked the POV switching, but many here will tell you it's bad practice to do this. Has it been happening the entire story?

Indenting/spacing was distracting. Paragraphs should be indented. I didn't like that the dialogue was double spaced.

Very emotional scene between Edward and his father, I'm assuming the plot has been working up to this moment? If so, very good. If this is the first time that their relationship is discussed critically like this, there needs to be more set up (I didn't see it mentioned in your chapter summaries, but I'm guessing you did do it).

Overall again, I liked it a lot. The issues I noticed are pretty minor I think, this is a good, well-written story.

/r/DestructiveReaders Thread