as a little girl my parents would leave me at country club houses when they'd go golfing with their friends. if i wasnt swimming at the pool i'd be hanging out with the bored old bartenders. this was an oldschool bar in the 90s and the men all wore suspenders and had handlebar mustaches. i remember spinning around the stools at those empty bars, helping them wipe glassware and thinking they were magical for knowing how to whistle. so they taught me how, gave me icecream and let me run around the back in my swimsuit. this went on for years and never once did anything nefarious happen.

there was also a bar across the art institution where id get classes as a kid. if my mom was late picking me up at night she'd instruct me "you GO TO THE BAR. NOWHERE ELSE" so alot of the times id be sitting there, an 8 yr old girl, at a busy bar with my muffin and bottle of peach nectarine. safe and happy. not sure where my parents got the idea that bars are safehavens for littke girls but it was nice while it lasted lol.

even though people say "its only creepy if you think it is" i really do believe that the constant bombardment of images of sexualized minors, the normalization of taboo kinks and news stories about pedophilic crimes are causing more people to contemplate and consider these insidious feelings. no bars for my future kids.