dude how do you put up with that. I had a problem drinking too. I couldnt handle my alcohol and my temper. That wasn't the main issue my wife and I had early in our marriage but it definitely exacerbated the situation. My wife didn't tell me to quit drinking. She left and we spent some hard months apart going to counseling but she never put out an ultimatum. That wouldn't have worked and she knows it. I would never do it to her either because I can't think of anything worse for a friendship or romantic relationship than ultimatums. They just spark resentment that grows and grows. don't drink now because I realized I culdn't control my anger. My wife doesn't drink either. not a drop no matter where we are. She knows I enjoy drinking and she never really did drink too much but she doesn't touch it at all because I can't. Sometimes I'll have some kind of specialty beer or we'll each have a glass of wine but that is two or three times a year at most. She never drinks at all out of respect for me unless it is one of those agreed upon occassions. I can imagine you are furious with your wife pulling that kind of BS.