(26 M) Coworker who wanted to take things slow is constantly hot and cold.. Her ex is also trying I get back with her..

Well.. since this post I actually talked to her and she’s basically told me her ex is moving back & that they’ll try again.

She’s also moving house, leaving the job at pretty much the exact time he’s moving to the city. A fellow coworker did warn me she runs back to her ex but when we first started talking, she assured me she’d like to take things slow with me but I’ve realised she just wanted friends with benefits, in the conversation I had with her, she said that she even told her ex that until he’s back in the country, she’s not committed to him so I guess I know where I stand now.

I’m not trying to create a painful story for myself, she’s not been honest with me from the start so I guess I got off lucky. I told her my situation with my ex & that I’m not trying to fuck about yet she clearly wanted to have a quick fuck buddy while her ex was out the country. In the same conversation she casually told me that whatever happened between us should stay between us, like is the fucking right to say to someone who you weren’t even honest with from the start? I won’t go running to her ex to till him how I feel she’s used me because she needed company but you can say I’m attributing malicious intent but she blatantly used me for her own needs, she completely switched up & now she’s handed her 30 day notice in, I’m meant to act like nothing happened?

Girls don’t like when guys treat them like this but when girls do it, especially when she’s said she wanted to take things slow & wanted to make sure I’m not using HER as she’s apparently been used before which is the most ironic thing about this. I promised her I ain’t like that get she clearly is that type of girl.

I am pissed because I’m not the type of guy who’s going to make it awkward for her, I’ll still have a laugh with her at work but it’s crazy how she’s acting like she hasn’t just used me. If it was a agreed fuck buddy type of deal, i wouldn’t feel any type of way about it but it’s just the fact she knew her ex was moving back and that she’s going to get back with him yet lead me on until I told her I wanted to have a honest conversation.

The funniest thing is, In that conversation she asked me if I was engaged to my ex bc she believed a rumour at work that I was and when I said no, she was surprised and was like “that changes everything”

Anyways, it’s back to being work friends until she leaves and tbh I don’t have any hard feelings towards her, just would’ve preferred she was honest from the beginning.

/r/relationships Thread Parent