I (27M) need advice on how to address my GF's (27F) recent weight gain.

  Look, I know you say you love her the same as you did *before* she gained the weight but this post is riddled with your anxiety of her weight (Will she keep gaining? Will this affect my happiness? Lifestyle change?) which is ok to have! But you have to be honest. 

  If you get married presumably to show the utmost commitment to her, you'll both age and most likely have some weight fluctuating along the way. I think you being hyper aware of her food habits are a sign of *your* anxiety about her weight. 
  Now she may have some legitimate issues with depression or circumstantial lifestyle habit changes that will need to addressed but you should probably handle your own anxieties first. Because if you bring those to the table as well, progress on either will be quite chaotic.

Ask yourself can I accept this extra 20 lbs for the rest of my life?

  No?  That's a deal breaker, and needs to be communicated accordingly. You can't change people majority of the time.


  Yes? Then you need to navigate this in a preservable way. "I love you and I hate to see how depressed/stressed/insecure you are feeling and want to help you. Let's join a fitness class/healthy eat plan/gym/insert any healthy activity. Your unhappiness is my unhappiness and I want us to be team." 
  DO NOT "I notice you are eating candy/junk food/being lazy, howabout you just replace that with celery and move some more then you will lose those 20lbs! So Easy!"


  Lastly about the food smacking, is that new? That's something you just straight up communicate. As long as you aren't saying "Hey shut your fucking mouth when you chew you pig!" that one is easy.
/r/relationships Thread