i'm having a hard time following. either you're leaving a lot of pertinent info out, or you're simply getting spun up because your husband (who may simply have an ax to grind with your parents?) has told you you should be spun up.

how is being taken to the doctor for chicken pox something that "happened to you" that "isn't okay"? why are your parents jerks for not paying for their adult child's wedding? what care did you need that you weren't given?

as for your parents' shit-talking on you to your sister... DID you do things to hurt their feelings? WERE you horrible? and how does "she was shitty and hurtful" parlay into "we were worried about her," anyway? if you were shitty and horrible, why would they be worried? and why are they bad guys FOR being worried?

again, there's either a LOT missing here, or your husband has some sort of weird issue with them that you are easily-led enough to take on as your own.

i don't know, i just don't get why a nearly 30 year old woman, who seems to have previously had no issues with her parents or her upbringing, is suddenly feeling bad that her parents didn't "talk" to her and treated her badly by... taking her to the doctor when she had chicken pox.

i don't get it, i'm sorry.