wow OK I think we're getting our signals crossed a little here.

If you know someone over several years then yes I can 'unironically and without shame' know when they're depressed. No-one fakes depression to get attention. Some people do however like being sad, you'll find this out.

I'm ashamed of my comments so far reading them back, I didn't explain myself well. I actually volunteer with children and young with a range of disabilities, many of whom due to the loneliness and isolation that comes with that suffer from depression. I my experience depression like any disease comes in a range of forms with a range of severity. Some people I've spoken to are dead inside, others are going through a rough patch and will be OK in a few weeks. There is no sliding scale but some people are affected worse than others.

My analogy was that sadness is like a cold, unpleasant but manageable, whereas flu is potentially deadly and a terrible disease, that like depression I would not wish on my worst enemy.

I strongly believe everyone gets depression at some point in their lives. I also believe depression is a range of conditions, with a range of causes and potential help. Some people talk their way out of depression, some replace sadness with routine. Point being depression is 100% not one thing. I've had no professional training everything I've learnt from others and first hand. In my opinion the best way to help someone with depression is by listening, and re-wording what they say until they see their problems are not insurmountable. I don't know if this is an accepted way of doing things but it seems to work.

'Think about what you're saying here. You're asking strangers for advice on how to not only ignore but actively play down the problems of people near you' NO, I apologise if that is how I came across this is absolutely not what I wanted to say. Do not follow this. If you know someone with depression reach out to them. If you do have depression remember other people still have feelings and that you can really hurt them, as I believe blue did in the original post. A thing that people with depression do far too often (not blaming them its the disease doing it) is to make others around them feel the same. If you are depressed and reading this really try and fight this urge. This was my whole complaint about the post, blue is lashing out at people that are trying to help them and this really hurts people that are close to you.

'Everything you typed make me believe you're a terrible person.' I'm writing such a long reply because this really hurt me. I'm not perfect and I've made mistakes but I try and be good.

I kind of wandered into this sub, but from what I've seen I really don't like it. It seems to be too focused on having depression rather than surviving and living with it, and I can never see depression as some sort of joke.