Realize that it has nothing to do with your appearance. You could completely change your appearance and LO still wouldn’t be head over heels for you (because appearance isn’t the only factor in falling in love). Also, the right person is going to find you insanely attractive. It isn’t about appearance because I’ve had objectively better looking guys than my LO fall madly in love with me, yet he didn’t. Oh well. His loss. I’ve had multiple marriage propositions from better looking guys than LO, yet he never noticed me. Meh. Whateves.
The chemistry is mostly on our side, but we don’t see that when we are in the fog. We see the glimmer, their smile, the fact that they are nice to us, the fact that they sometimes look at us or laugh at our jokes, the fact that they compliment us— as evidence that they feel exactly what we’re feeling. They don’t. They might find us attractive or fun or interestinf or nice. But if they were madly in love, we would know. There wouldn’t be any doubt, because when people are truly in love they are consistant with their actions. They are available. And if they aren’t available, then they become available (leave their marriage, whatever). Falling in love isn’t all about looks. Mostly it’s about relational patterns that began in childhood, a person’s family growing up, genetic factors, socialization, etc. It really has nothing to do with you. Some people are only attracted to unavailable people, for example (like us). We could meet Chris Hemsworth right now, and it would have no effect on us because we are hung up on our LO. Does that mean he’s not attractive? Of course not.
No contact is the best way to deal with this. Don’t put yourself through that torture. Make a clean break and you will feel better with time.