yeah i am eating a sandwich as i type this. ugh.

i'm frustrated. and people are probably right.. im sure it's that my eating habits are trash.. and not just the medicine. i'm just not sure..

i found a new psych and just told him that i didnt want to take meds anymore because of the weight aspect. he said he would try to find something that was more weight neutral.

i hate even saying that because i've never been really obsessed with my weight or how i look but now it's all i think about. i hate the way i look and think about it every time i see myself in a mirror. it's frustrating for sure.

if you're still depressed.. maybe you should go back to your doctor? i know it takes a while to find something that works. i don't think i really have yet. I'd say i am "better" in some respects.. like I'm getting up and doing shit during the day. but i still have plenty of times where i'm withdrawn and not down to see or talk to humans and find myself crying in the bathroom.

honestly i dont know whats normal anymore. ha