Sometimes we have to do things we dont want to do in relationships if it is important and means alot to the other
Which means her partner could also tell his family they are living together. That way, iy would fair for both on them. I am also a person that likes harmony and I like to make people feel good, but that doesn't mean that as a woman I have to act like a martyr. When a partner just asks and does not give in return about the same amount he receives, he is disrespectful! No offense.
this sounds like one of those situations where you going would mean the world to him
OP never wrote those words, so please do not put words in her mouth. It would be important because he would be the only one without his partner by his side. This could make him feel either way, which is not up us to know, just to assume. And even if we assume something, that doesn't mean he respects OP more or that he will stop lying to his family.
you staying would just be a a little less stress in your day
She would not post here, if for her was just a little less stress.
your really only getting one evening of not putting on a show
No, that would get her acknowledged the fact they live together. He cares more about the images he presents, than to tell his parents.
I also understand his perspective, but lets not forget OP feels bad just as much as her partner. Why should he be the only one having the advantage, instead of him making a little effort on his side to have both of the benefiting?
Why should one have full disclosure while the other suffer, while he could bring himself to make the same sacrifice/compromise as OP?
Why isn't he also making compromise? The REAL question here.
. A lot for a little
He could also sacrifice a little for a lot. He could sacrifice upsetting his parents a bit, for the sake of his partner. At the end of the day, he no longer lives with his parents, but with OP. His main concern should be what's happening inside his OWN home, if he is a real man and not a momma's baby.
But if you want a quality future eventually you are going to have to confront this eventually.
He should also confront his parents, at some point. And its not just about OP, its about his partner in the future. I