Neil,

This is Bella.

I'm at a total loss. You're ignoring me on every platform - and I know you're online because my grey Ds turn bold when you open your app. And because you changed your damn Kik pic. What the hell, dude?

I am asking Phil to move out. And this time I'm filing for divorce. It's a lot to go through and I just hadn't been online for about 6 days. In that time you send me a message to say that I don't want to talk to you anymore and then proceed to screen my messages?

Is that all I did wrong? Take a few days to myself.

I don't expect to be sexual with you all of the time. I don't even expect for you to be my Daddy. But I thought we were friends!? I thought I could not speak to you for 6 days while my life falls apart and, when I come back, you'll be there. With a smile and a cheeky anecdote. Because that's what friends do.

But you abandoned me... again.

You are the only person I still use Kik to speak to.

Yes... you. No... not even Chicago.

Without you there's no point anymore. So you won't be able to reach me there anymore.

I had so much fun getting to know you. I almost wish we'd met under normal circumstances so that we could have been normal friends.

But we didn't. And you'll never really respect me for that. I'm just another girl you met online. Except I've never been young enough or cute enough or pretty enough to keep your attention.

And yes, I know. I know that I haven't been as attentive the last few weeks. But I have had so much shit in my real life. And I wasn't ready to talk about it with you yet. I'm barely processing what is happening myself.

I feel like I barely have a handle on reality right now. And being rejected by you is like a kick while I'm down.

Why can you never be honest with me, Neil? Why always with the ghosting?

This is the part where I'd like to tell you to go fuck yourself. But I can't because... well, you'll always be my friend, even if you don't count me as one of yours.

Enjoy your trip to London. Love to you and to your girls. Maybe I'll hear from you again someday.

My door is always open. I'm soft like that.

Annabelle.xx