I'm so, so sorry you're going through this pain, too. If there is one thing I've learned from all of this...I will NEVER silence the voice in my head or ignore the pit in my stomach when I think something is off. My intuition was spot fucking on. That's what makes me hurt the most. I already suffer from mental illnesses and PMDD. I already had insecurity and self doubt. He took advantage of that. I legitimately admitted myself to a psychiatric hospital not once, but TWICE because of his abuse and lies and gaslighting.

Cheaters aren't as slick as they think. There are tells and signs to watch out for. I hope you find the healing you need and that you never experience this kind of absolute heartbreak again.