I[40m] divorced my wife[39f] because I wasn't happy with our relationship, now she tells people I did it because she was "old" and looking to trade up because of my new girlfriend[27f]

You made the classic mistake of asking for advice on an age gap relationship on Reddit, that never ends well.

I've been through something similar. Divorced my wife, ended up dating younger girls because hell, why not, I could. After years of no sex and a wife that didn't take care of herself it was amazing to date girls that gave a shit about their appearance and were insatiable in bed. It felt GREAT after years of being ignored and rejected. But we can't really admit that those things are important, because then we're sexist shallow pigs that only care about appearances and sex.

Now, obviously I left my wife for other reasons than just the ones listed above. She cheated on me multiple times, would lock herself up in the house because of mental issues she refused to get treatment for, would constantly ignore my opinions on everything, etc. And guess what happened after I divorced her? She started obsessing about her appearance, dressed well, worked out religiously (she never set foot in a gym in 11 years of marriage), got medication for her mental issues, etc. So now a lot of people that look at her will probably think wow, she seems perfect. And there's that asshole ex husband that left her for no reason and is dating a much younger girl. That poor woman.

And you know what, it is what it is. I don't correct anyone. I don't drag her name through the mud letting people know what I went through. I'm happy, that's all that matters. Extremely happy. I was miserable for the majority of my marriage and I tried everything, begged her to go to therapy. Nobody will ever know that because I refuse to go into details.

Just be happy, be a good dad, be a good partner, and don't ever try to talk bad about your ex wife. People will stop gossiping soon enough.

/r/relationships Thread