[41/m] My wife [36/f] confirmed she is leaving me on Christmas day (long)

Like ever? You don't always have to exaggerate to prove a point. I've gone to some of your family functions. When you give me the choice on whether I want to go or not, I usually did not want to for various reasons (parties in the middle of the week when I have to get up @ 5:30am to go to work the next morning was a big one, like 60% of the time these things were going on on a Tuesday night). What get's me though, is that you never indicate this was a problem for you until much much later. You'd always acted like you understood. Really though you were pissed and not telling me about it.

It wasn't just the last couple of months. Those months were particularly bad because I gave up, too. You make yourself out to be a martyr but I fail to see the effort you've made. If you were actually trying, you'd be finding some way of telling me what you were feeling or helping me fix our communication problem instead of silently pulling away. If you were actually trying, you'd take a step back and at least attempt to see it from my point of view every once in a while. It felt like I was always the enemy to you. Yet, here you are saying you alone were "propping up" the relationship. I just don't know what to say to that.

You "tried" by asking me to counselling. Did you actually read what I wrote? You gave no context! You said nothing about it other than you wanted to go! It's not like we're rolling in money here, coming close to broke at the beginning of the year. I'm certainly not seeing the value in going when you haven't even told me you were unhappy to begin with.

I gave you attention like that for a long time, until I found out about that letter you sent to your ex. We already know how that made me feel. I tried to bring it back when we got back together, but I felt like I was just leaving myself open for it to happen again.

Half-truths? Nothing half-truth about what I wrote, it's a full on valid point.

/r/relationship_advice Thread