This is really succinct and it feels intuitively like it might be it in some aspects. I’ve always been on the outer because of the religious divide, and also life choices. They all marry and have lots of kids and live in the country, and I was the corporate exec living in the city and never married and have no children.

But still, we had strong relationships and lots of affection. I had spent a lot of time caring for my nieces and nephews when they were growing up (I am the baby and not much older than them) so we had a bond.

So I think if I’m on the outer it’s maybe more that I don’t have the same sort of life as them. And I think you are right about the parents papering over the divide. As matriarch and patriarch of sorts I suppose also their presence meant we all unconsciously behaved better too.