I admire your strength to be able to make those hard decisions. You had to stop setting yourself on fire to keep others warm. You appear to have been socially manipulated into marriage and children. If the society you were born into had not had these social norms you would likely never married and had children at 16. It is a tragedy for you, your first husband and your children, and if I am right in my guess about the country you escaped from, three of your four children would have been considered burdens with no value and your daughter would have been placed in basically the same situation you were placed in in the same age range. So many of these responses crucify you for the decisions you made, but how many of them were ever in your, or a similar, situation. If you haven't lived it you have no right to judge, and that is not just for this situation.