(Note: my own perspective on the matter is from an Anabaptist "'ultra' conservative" perspective. My own thoughts on this may not match what other Christians would think of the matter. Take it as you will.)
I won't criticize the way you feel. It is a hard thing for many to deal with. I had been strongly pro "choice" for most of my life.
I simply ask you to consider the following:
1) Understand that God is the ultimate judge.
He sees all and knows all. He is the flawless embodiment of good. Realize then, that a being of such infinite, flawless power by definition, He cannot judge unwisely or unfairly. His judgement is perfect because He is perfection.
If you are concerned that He will somehow hold an unfair judgement against someone on the case of abortion, then don't be worried. Such a thing is not possible. Either He is perfect, or He is not. There is no "Yes but..." on this matter.
The only thing that hinges on whether a person can be forgiven for abortion then, is if they have turned from their sin, and put their trust in God and the sacrifice that his Son made for their sin.
2) When you become a Christian, you become a slave to God. (Romans 6:22) (See bottom explanation, if you are unfamiliar with the historical term of "slave". It does not refer to someone who is kidnapped and put into lifetime of servitude.)
As a slave of God, you do not need to agree with every choice that your master makes - you are not some mindless automaton, without any thoughts or emotions of your own - far from it! You are still a person with very many strong opinions, emotions, and beliefs that may run counter in the face of everything that you have come to trust.
However, as a slave, you are expected to do as your master commands. This is the price of salvation. To turn from your sin, and to trust in God and the sacrifice He has made for your sin. That is, you are to obey and to do as you are commanded. To follow His instruction, not as you please. Those who do not do so face the punishment for their disobedience. (Matthew 25:14-30, Jeremiah 8:4-22)
Personally, I find Jeremiah 8:20 to be the second most horrifying verses of the entire Bible; the most horrifying verse being Matthew 7:23. Jeremiah 8:20 is a line which fills me with a kind of fear I cannot shake. The sudden realization is such a horrible thing.
As Christians, we should never forget that this could easily, very easily, be ourselves.
---
A "slave" in the Biblical sense is:
Someone who is poor. They have no family or friends that are able or willing to take them in. They have fallen on extremely hard times, and if they are not taken in, they will starve to death.
Out of desperation, they present themselves on the streets, asking to be taken in by someone and in exchange, will do their biding for food, shelter, and clothing. A Biblical slave is not a kidnapped person, and is not someone who is expected to serve for life. The Bible defined the concept of jubilee (freedom). Slavery was not to be a lifetime appointment - except by free choice - on the part of the slave.
To be clear: many masters, of course, failed to honor what was written and kept slaves under cruel conditions. This was in direct violation to what was written, and was repeatedly referenced as one of the primary reasons for why the people were punished - for mistreating their slaves.
A slave to God is one who has, out of desperation, under the realization that they will die without Grace, has given their life over to God in exchange for salvation. A slave to God is not someone who was kidnapped or somehow forced to serve God, but instead someone who has voluntarily given our lives over to Him willingly.
(As an Anabaptist, I also hold the perspective that salvation is a thing which can be lost, or given up - to choose to no longer be a slave of God. Of course, many, many Christians strongly disagree with me on that. I don't fault them on it, but I don't wish to debate it here. I thought I should mention it, though.)