Action Dan here, what's your funniest "and then I got banned" story??

I was part of this longtime chatroom that originated from the frequent users of a website dedicated to clothing and upscale fashion. I was a loner in high school and involving myself in this website was a great way to escape the realities of being a loner. My dad wasn't really in the picture and I was raised by a single mother so I never developed a sense for how to develop male on male plutonic relationships. I was infinitely more comfortable around females, so as I developed in high school I got a couple of hot body girlfriends and ended up not being a total gay.

As I matured, I still had issues maintaining same sex friendship, which is why I maintained my status as a regular poster on these chat rooms and forums.

3 years from my registration date on the forum, there was a moderator uprising and the forum split into renegade groups. My group became nomads wandering from stickam to google hangouts to finally settling in an application called Slack.

From the thousands of users on the parent forum, us roughly 20 people genesised through the Internet dessert like Moses, and became closer and closer. Ultimately adding each other on Facebook Instagram and snapchat. We had become family.

With the help of the Slack Crew and my long time girlfriend of 3 years, I finally felt a sense of social acceptance, and no longer felt like a loner. I had a nice balance between introverted space and social inclusion.

Being that it is so easy to open an application and jump into conversation, most of the Slack Crew were communicating for hours of the day. We became closer and closer with my role in the community being the rugged bad boy type.

Trying to balance my job as a sale associate at a cellular company, a live in girlfriend, and copious amounts of recreational drugs and nights out; tragedy struck. My girlfriend broke up with me. I ended up relying more and more on the Slack Crew for social acceptance and overtime started to think that they were the only friends I really needed.

The Slack Crew chat room was created and moderated by the newest addition to the crew, a member who joined just months prior to the moderator uprising on the fashion forum. She was brash, lived in another country, went to an all girls catholic school, and liked anime. What I mean, is that she was fucking insane.

As more time passed since my girlfriend broke up with me I developed an even deeper emotional connection with her as my yearning for female attention grew and grew. I started to tell her I would fuck her, and that she would be my sexual slave. She ended up sending me pictures of her masterbating and I urged her to buy a big ass buttplug and send me videos of her try to insert it. It was a relationship that burned too bright too quick.

I wanted to meet her and experience her wild sex and decided we would meet in a third world country as me being on limited funds, the dollars would stretch more. I flew both her and I out on my dime, paid for the 7 nights in a hotel.

We fucked like animals and she told me she loved me. I would wake up after a furious fuck session with her rubbing my chest saying she was listening to me snore as I slept and it was the cutest thing she ever saw.....she was fucking crazy.

As the vacation drew to an end I realized that despite all the things she had going for her, like the mental instability and banging body, my heart of hearts was still with my girlfriend.

I purchased return flights to each of our perspective countries on the same day it just so happened that my flight left an hour earlier than hers. As we are at the terminal she's weeping on my arms saying she's going to miss me and how much she loves me and I'm putting up a sad facade because I don't want to make things awkward and my lack of a father figure lead me to be a spineless adult. As I walked onto the plane I could see her through the window in the terminal crying and waving, I just smiled and waved knowing I would never see her again.

I get back stateside and despite my buddy romance with the Slack Crew moderator, both of us kept it a secret until the vacation meet up when we posted pics to our perspective instagrams gaining the attention of the Slack Crew members and my then ex-girlfriend.

The Slack Crew was wildly curious about how me and crazy anime moderator met and if my penis was really as large as I advertised (it's not). Crazy anime moderator was praising it though like the sword of Excalibur on the chat and I became more popular than ever amongst the Slack Crew members.

As my popularity was rising, so was the interest of my ex girlfriend after she stalked my Instagram and saw pictures of me with a hot young thing. I decided the time was ripe to finally try to leverage the crazy anime moderator against my ex girlfriend.

I acted like I didn't give a shit about my ex, and this drove her wild. She would call me daddy and come over and fuck me only to have me kick her out. I was facading at this point on two fronts....one with my ex about not caring, and another one on the Slack about actually caring about the crazy anime moderator.

Everything came to fruition when I decided that I would take back my girlfriend. Crazy anime moderator and I would text constantly but when I decided about my ex, I ghosted her entirely. She would FaceTime text and call even threatening to fly to the United States to force me to talk to her, she really loved me.

I still was going on the Slack while I was ghosting her, she would see me post and reply to everything I said while I maintained my digital distance. I still considered the Slack Crew my family and best friends.

One night my ex posted a picture of me and her kissing to her own Instagram and after a week of being ignored crazy anime moderator girl became despirate to try to find a reason as to why I was avoiding her. Crazy anime moderator ended up finding the picture of me and my ex, and told her side of this story to the rest of my Slack Crew brethren.

I guess all the Slack was alike in the sense we were all somewhat social recluses with an exceptional lack of daily and meaningful female interactions. After crazy anime moderator chick told her side of the story in the Slack, the Slack Crew got together and had a secret vote on google hangouts regarding my behavior. They white knighted the shit out of the crazy anime moderator and decided in secret that my punishment was to be exile from the group.

One day I opened the slack to find that my account had been deactivated...

I am still going out with my ex girlfriend but she no longer calls me daddy. No one from the Slack Crew has reached out to me aside from one or two people and all have basically removed me from their social media. I am sure another Slack Crew member has the pleasure of sexting with crazy anime moderator chick and seeing the wild possibilities of anal insertions. But this is a story of how I lost 20 of the realist friendships that I maintained for over 8 years because of butthole pleasures and love.

/r/AskReddit Thread