Great comment. When my ex left me to enter a relationship with another woman it was after a solid year of trying to cope with her discovery of her lesbian self within our marriage after an initial one night stand.

She was broken at the end of the year. It wasn't about sex or romance our romantic love. She told me she felt "shattered" like a broken mirror.

Also, as OP praises the blogs of members hanging with a mixed marriage while gay, I'm fairly certain he was aware of the couple he outlines in his piece and probably thought they were fantastic, Intelligent people before the marriage dissolved. Now, they've suddenly lost their intellect and good judgement and are worthy of criticism? As he alludes to other couple's blogs, will the same thing happen as some of them dissolve their marriages. Good, then suddenly bad?

Like my personal experience, it seems they fought a good fight but it just didn't work out. I fought like hell for my marriage but it wasn't in the cards in the end. She felt like she was "shriveling" and was going to lose her sanity if she stayed. She left me heartbroken and to this day I wish she would have chosen to stay. But I certainly saw it for what it was - not a need for romance but a need to survive.