Tl:dr below. Sorry! I wrote a long response since you're studying in a relevant field and might be a little more qualified to understand my situation than the standard neckbeard Redditor failing entry chem.
Starting off...
I know, I am trying to get off the Xanax (actually, generic Xanax ER, ~.40mg down from 1mg in 2014) I think I might have been slightly misunderstood--I know it will fuck you up if you take it consistently for over a month or so. But that's why it's so hard for me to stop taking them.
As for the Ritalin, I need it. I'm very, very confident in my ADHD diagnosis since I showed a lot of very obvious signs long before I started developing a legitimate anxiety issue (from when I was a little kid) and ADHD runs in my mom's family. Actually, I'd say it ruined my childhood and stunted developmental growth since I have the explosive/impulsive sub-type, but that's a story for another place. Alas, my medication right now keep me at bay... for the most part.
For the psych doctors, I left my last one because while he accurately diagnosed me at the start, he was adamant on keeping me on a benzodiazepine and it made me angry that he was so dismissive. I used to be on a SNRI and I will say I miss it a lot. But the one in question, Pristiq, was probably not quite the right fit. Back then though, I wasn't on Ritalin. *Now I'm on Lamotrigine, Gabapentin, and that accursed Xanax (midnightly) other than the Ritalin. It makes me angry thinking about all those potential conflicting mixes I could be having in my medication pool right now. Good for diagnosing... garbage for actual help, that man. Can't go off them either because no psychiatrist right now *sigh
You say I should actually go to my general practitioner in the meantime? I don't trust most basic doctors to give me the right fit, even if they are good at steering me in the right direction towards something helpful. She is only there atm to refill my Ritalin, after I stopped getting the necessary slips from that asshole psychiatrist.
I know I'm in a shit spot right now. I'm really trying to find the right doctor and I think I've found one, but because of... legal communication issues related to the ADA, it's harder than usual.
But
You say (and the other commenter) that my current predicament is not good for me right now. I knew it wasn't good but I was not sure how bad, so it is a bit refreshing yet chilling to get such confirmations. Thank you. Please respond back if you can! I will not drive anymore for a while.