Advice for getting back out there?

I'm in a similar-ish situation. I just ended my 6 yr relationship and moved back home to my parents' because of COVID and not wanting to live alone. I gained a bunch of weight in my relationship because I was very depressed and stressed about school. I don't really understand how dating works in the 'new-age', and frankly, I'm not looking for a relationship right now (I know that our timing is different in that regard). However, I also know that positive male attention would help me move on. At the same time, all the dating apps feel like so much work with everything else going on in my life right now. At most, I would be interested in hooking-up but I'm not about to do that during a pandemic nor am I going to invite anyone over here.

I worry about how I would look to potential suitors (26, living at my parents....). But that really only stresses me out when Im not even interested IN having suitors right now. I guess it's more of a loneliness and anxiety about my future (as you've sort of mentioned). Instead, I'm focusing on positive goals. I'm studying for the LSAT, I've quit drinking, I'm going to start running again, etc. I know a big part of dating is confidence and self-love, so I'm working on me right now. I don't need vapid, germy interactions for external validation.

If you've waited this long to get back into dating, I would say to hold off a bit longer. Work on yourself. Think of your ideal partner and then try to become their ideal partner. If you see personal flaws, other people see them too. Relationships shouldn't be born out of loneliness and desperation because your 'happiness' will be founded in the absence of pain, not the presence of positive connection and mutual desire. Even if I'm 40-years-old I'm not jumping into a relationship just to be in one. I'm going to wait until it is right.

/r/dating_advice Thread