I agree about talking to her about it. Don't just assume things. And if she is asexual she could greatly benefit from realizing this about herself.

That being said. Assuming that she is indeed asexual(and sex repulsed), one thing I would ask yourself is what do you want out of sex with her? You mention feeling unloved and disconnected from her, are there other ways she could make you feel loved? What about cuddling, or exchanging massages? Or something like taking a bath together if she doesn't mind nudity? You could both make an effort to be physically affectionate with each other in ways that aren't sexual. I understand that that isn't the same as sex but it might help with the emotional aspect. Being touch starved is totally a real thing and doesn't have to be sexual.

There are herbs and stuff that can increase libido(may be less intimidating/invalidating then a doctor), which is separate from asexuality(sexual attraction). But if she has zero libido it might not do anything(just her nature). If she has a higher libido she might be more open to sexual acts even if she is asexual. If she's not sex-repulsed you might be able to form a compromise though. Even if its not 50-50.

Ultimately communication is important. If you are feeling unloved tell her that. Don't guilt trip her, but let her know you need more emotional support and affection. It's important though for you not to tie your self-worth up in how much sex you are having. Because even if you comprise 50-50 it will be less then you want. You deserve to feel loved and wanted by your SO. Part of that is her making sure you know you are loved, but the other part is you believing her.

Idk. Sorry for the long post. I hope some of that is helpful.