AITA for correcting my daughter’s teacher about her name?

TL;DR: I was called the wrong name by teachers 7th-12th grade. There weren't very many plus sized girls in my school and so teachers (and sometimes students) just used our names interchangeably. It had lasting effects on me and gave me a warped sense of identity into adulthood.

Hi. I just want to comment and add my perspective as someone who has been called the wrong name my entire life and why it is incredibly important for a child to be called the correct name. This post hurts my heart.

My name is Anna (pronounced Ann-uh). By the second week of 7th grade I could see my name was a huge issue with teachers for some reason. They kept calling me the wrong name. This happened until I graduated. I was polite and corrected them multiple times, and they always quickly apologized and continued on, but almost ALWAYS messed it up again later. It always bothered me though. I was a straight A student and some of these teachers I had for years and felt I had a connection with them. It kinda confused me. It made me dislike my name and think of it as boring or forgetful. I couldn't figure out why no one could remember my name.

I was severely bullied as a kid for being nerdy, shy, and chubby. I was that kid picked last in PE class so the PE teacher was forced to beg a team to take me. I sat in the bathroom at lunch to avoid being bullied, or didn't eat lunch at all because kids would make fun of me when I ate because I was a little bigger. I had no friends. My parents going through a divorce during this time definitely felt like rubbing salt in an open wound. I felt forgotten at school and home.

One day in particular I just broke down when I got home. I finally realized why I got called the name of other girls all the time. It was my Sophomore year. A teacher called me Jenna. She had done this multiple times. I corrected her each time. But this time she just laughed and said, "Same thing, you all look the same!"

I couldn't understand why. Our hair was different, our eyes were different, our skin was different. How could we look the same?

Here's the catch: I realized that I only got mixed up with other plus sized girls with acne. I was called Jenna, Alissa, Bailey, Beth, and Amy for years. The only thing those girls and I had in common is that we were curvy, had acne, and were severely bullied for it. Other students throughout the years had brought up that they noticed the pattern too.

Hearing that. Hearing "Same thing, you all look the same". Broke me as a kid. I heard similar things multiple times after that too. I felt like my identity didn't matter. I felt like the only thing people saw when they looked at me was my fat or my pimples. While this likely was not true to that extent, as a teenage girl who was already in therapy for body dysmorphic disorder, it was devastating. I struggled with an eating disorder for the last couple of years of high school. It's funny, after going from 140 to 87 pounds, I got called my actual name more often.

I became a teacher myself. While I no longer teach because I decided that I wanted to go into programming, I LOVED playing name games to remember the names of my students. I LOVED getting to learn those hard to pronounce names. I made sure that when I was addressing a student, even one-on-one, I said their name often in conversation. I did not want any of these kids to feel like they were forgotten.

I know this is obviously much different than your Keeley's situation. But it is so important for her to love her name and own it. I hated my name and thought it was meaningless for years. She deserves respect. Her teacher is an asshole. Thank you so much for standing up for your daughter.

/r/AmItheAsshole Thread