NTA- totally understandable why you wouldn't mention gender.
My girl and I play battlefield together and we were talking via squad chat once because PS4 party's were down for some reason. Some guy was talking to us and we got on with him. I left briefly and in that time some other guy joined in the squad chat.
When I came back we were all talking fine and my girlfriend said something flirty to me and the new guy asked why she couldn't flirt with him and she said "because he's my man." He absolutely flipped out calling her a liar hahaha
So I took the piss out of him for a good 10 minutes before he left. Incels are an unfortunate part of the gaming community. I know it's not easy but the best thing to do is to ignore them. I honestly wish my girl could talk without some little virgin hyping himself up enough to try and talk to her in a way that's flirty expecting something, she plays to have fun not to be hit on by some ugly cretin. So you're not alone here. There are communities in gaming made up with women for this reason