Very well put. My grandmother has been in a very difficult battle the last few years with a handful of illnesses and hasn't been doing well for a long time. She used to be so alert, chatty, sharp, and was always there to talk through anything, and now she's just not there anymore. Her body fails her over and over in any way that it can, and she's still here physically, but it's taken a huge toll on her. She doesn't remember me or most people when she is awake, but more often than not she is asleep or in a state of confusion. She can't get out of the hospital bed or even sit up anymore. She's constantly fighting some new infection or problem with her organs.

It was extremely difficult on my mom, especially during the beginning, but over time she has been able to come to terms with it. She said her goodbyes one of the last times my grandmother was lucid, told her how much she loved her, had a heartfelt conversation and closure. And now she just keeps her company over the phone every day that she's awake enough to talk. My mom has told me that she has said her goodbyes and that my grandmother is already gone by now. She has come to terms with it and is at peace. She said when she finally does pass, it will not be as hard on her as it would have years ago. It will just be her physical body moving on so she doesn't have to be in so much pain anymore. My mom still has the memory of who she was and holds it close to her heart, but she has had a long time to come to terms with this.

I know these are different circumstances, but I couldn't imagine if one day my grandmother was there and then suddenly wasn't. As heartbreaking and difficult as watching someone slowly leaving you is, we had the time to see it coming and prepare- say goodbye, do everything that we meant to do before. A sudden loss is so traumatizing and leaves so much unsaid.