ESH. You guys need to both compromise on how much is spent on the WHOLE THING, and then go a) halves on it; b) split the cost according to your means.

Don't start planning until she has a job because that will give you both a better idea of how much you can contribute.

Also, don't be that person that holds ridiculous and old promises over someone's head. That's lame. Relationships and life things change.

Lastly, assuming you live in a western country, 25k is not 'way up there' for a wedding, while 15k for a vacation actually is pretty costly. Most people invite their family and friends to traditional weddings which, depending on circumstances could be anywhere from 50-200 people. So yeah, a normal but traditional wedding is gonna be fucking expensive if y'all know a lot of people.