No, it’s not exactly like this.

My mom took care of me almost alone for years, since they were not married (for Italian law at that time there were no obligations for my father) and she did not want to involve lawyers, they did an economic settle without any third parties. Since my mum had a good job, my father didn’t give me a large amount of money, simply bc my mum was able to provide me for everything. Things changed when after 2008 crisis she was forced to close her activity and change job (she graduated and become a teacher), but we had to move in a big city (from a very small town). At that point financial matters had to be cleared out and they hired lawyers (I was under 18 at the time). Since that moment my dad started to give my mother more money for me and decided to pay my uni, but note that uni in Italy is not as expensive as the US!

I don’t blame my mum for marring a guy who is fine by age and everything else, I don’t blame him for wanting to build a family that includes me. My stepfather was always caring and loves me and his kids at the same way, he put a lot of effort to create a bond with me, including taking a pause from his (abroad) job just to know me, about a year before marring my mother.