AITA for refusing to tell my baby’s father where I am?

I may get downvoted for this, but that is a bit disingenuous. My mom was a surrogate twice in the US. Surrogacy is a contractual process. Intended parents and gestational carriers mutually agree on what will be expected during the pregnancy well before the pregnancy even exists. Intended parents can request anything they like, but the gestational carrier can deny anything she likes, and in that case it will either not be included in the contract or the intended parents will move on and continue their search. No one is doing anything against their will here. Surrogacy provides a generous income to the carrier and creates families that couldn’t or wouldn’t exist otherwise. Surrogates choose surrogacy for lots of reasons, but my mom chose it because she enjoyed her pregnancies and wanted to be able to stay home with her own kids. My mom’s work helped provide for our family. The surrogate parents were incredibly grateful and still send Christmas cards although they have no obligation to maintain contact. It can be a wonderful thing, and again, every step of the process is a choice that was decided upon by both parties. I wanted to do it myself after seeing the joy my mom brought into the world in making those two families a reality but I had pre-eclampsia with my first which is a disqualification. But after that long ramble, my point is it’s not such a black-and-white thing and can actually be really amazing for families on both sides of it!

/r/AmItheAsshole Thread Parent