AITA for wanting biological children when I risk passing a mental illness onto them?


There is a genetic component to Bipolar 2, but it is often overstated. If your husband doesn't have it in his history, the risks aren't huge.

But honestly, when it comes to kids, I would worry more about upbringing, rather than genetics, when it comes to mental illness in this family of disorders.

I can't say whether being a parent is right for you, but I can say that my wife and I decided it wasn't right for us with her bipolar 2 diagnoses. No matter how well controlled her condition is, she inevitably has a breakdown, and when she does, the things that she does, and the words that come out of her mouth, are devastating.

As an adult, intellectually I know that it will pass, she will come through the episode, and that she is lashing out uncontrollably and doesn't necessarily mean what she is saying, but I would not want to subject a kid to living through that, and she doesn't want to either.

In short, I can't say what is right for you and your family, but I definitely encourage you to really sit down with a professional and your husband and talk all of this out so you go into this with a clear and clinical expectation for what to expect.

/r/AmItheAsshole Thread