AITA for what I said to my husband after discovering his infidelity?

ESH. It's not so black and white. Both parties are at fault. Did either of you consider getting counseling together over these issues before your departure? Hurt people hurt each other. You're NTA for telling him the truth, that he hurt you deeply with his constant nagging of another child and then later his infidelity, but you also left for a year with several issues still hanging in the air. Obviously, he shouldn't have cheated and is inexcusable. Please don't take me saying you leaving as assigning blame on you, that is NOT the case. I understand that that is your job and people can't always walk away from it. That's why I said it's not so black and white, because life isn't black and white. With your marriage on such rocky territory before leaving, perhaps you two should have discussed a few things at minimum like taking a break from each other and revisiting these issues when you were back from your tour. I don't know. Maybe I'm just talking out of my ass.

/r/AmItheAsshole Thread