In all honesty, how frequently do you smoke cannabis and what impact has it had on your life?

I'm not a huge Redditor and don't really know posting etiquette, but I'd like to share how trees have helped me. Sorry if I do anything wrong.

I started smoking around November of last year. Before then, I was an absolute mess. I had been struggling with depression for years, but I hit rock bottom around July. I couldn't leave my house, couldn't hold a job, dropped out of college, had to move back in with my parents, contemplated suicide constantly, etc. It was awful. One day a friend suggested I should try smoking once. "What's the worst that could happen?" I decided that I should at least do it once just to say I did. Me, being a new smoker, figured it would be the same as vaping. (Finally quit smoking using vaping. Go me.) I got way too high way too quick and had a bad time. I guess trying to "blow clouds" ising a pipe isn't something someone with not tolerance should do. After deciding to give it another chance, I absolutely loved smoking. I smoked almost all day every day. It was the one thing I could genuinely enjoy in life. My anxiety and depression just melted away. It gave me an appetite back, and I didn't throw up everything I ate. At night I could actually sleep! No more periods of 72 hours or more without sleep. My nightmares were less frequent. I finally felt like a normal, functioning person again and it was an amazing feeling. It got me off of all of the medicine I was shoved on when I was taken to the hospital after moving back in with my parents, and it kept me out of the bullshit therapy they forced me to attend. (They made me watch a kids movie for a "brain exercise." How does that help a depressed 20 something?)

Unfortunately, I live in an illegal state. I need to get a job so I can move out on my own and not be broke, but now that I've quit I can feel myself slipping back to my old ways. It feels hard to function without it. I find myself struggling to get out of bed. I'm starting to sleep less and less. I can never bring myself to apply for jobs. I never have te drive or energy. I can't piggyback off of other people forever, but what can I do when it feels like I'm being crushed by the world? I wish desperately that it would be legalized in one way or another. It has had such tremendous effects on me, but I have to break the law and be treated like a criminal to feel like a normal person.

/r/trees Thread