I guess its to be expected on a phycadelic sub

Haha I know, I know. It sounds cliché, but it really is a great way to describe the way you feel when interacting with the world. Porn drags you down and kills your confidence in yourself. It brings shame that you subconsciously carry around.

I just read that you're only 16. Brother. You have the ability to save yourself NOW. You don't want this to progress through your teens and into your twenties. It will immeasurably damage your life. You have the chance to nip this in the bud. I also read that you are a rape victim, and I am so very sorry. Unresolved trauma can present itself in strange and self-destructive ways, but you can mitigate this by attempting to come to terms with that trauma. Try abstaining from porn for a week and keeping a list of all the benefits you encounter. Keep a journal of when you felt an urge, and what you did to combat it.