So what you are saying is that cheating is pretty much the ultimate form of lying that carries the most negative weight, no matter the consequences. And in the traditional sense, where the guy finds romantic involvement with another girl, I completely 100% agree with you.

However, lets say me and you were dating, I was completely faithful, and one of my things was that you absolutely have no contact with your ex boyfriend, even though guys separated on good terms. Other then that, we have a great relationship, I go out of my way to do special things for you to make you happy, and you do the same.

Yet, you go to a friends gathering, and you see your ex there, and he just says, "hey, how you are doing". And you don't want to be rude and you say "fine thanks". And he tries to make conversation with you, but you don't want to cause a scene so you just reply with short remarks but mostly ignore him.

You didn't tell me because you didn't think it was a big deal - you didn't initiate the conversation and you were just being polite. Completely understandable from your point of view. However, one my friends mentions something to me the other day, "Hey Kasey and her ex were talking about something at the party".

My question is, do you think that this would be grounds for me to immediately break up with you because you are a shitty person?You violated my trust first by talking to him when I explicitly wished that you did not, and secondly by not telling me about it. Should I immediately dump you and not give you a second chance?

Because the way I see it, if you agree that I should dump you on the spot because of your shittiness, even though we had a good relationship, then we are in perfect agreement, and there is no need to continue this further.

But if you disagree, and don't think that what you did was bad and Im being overdramatic for dumping you, then there is an issue of cognitive dissonance here, because OP's situation is very similar (with the not receiving sexual pleasure from anyone else being implicit in the relationship unlike my explicit statement not to talk to your ex)

I refuse to believe that just because sex is involved it automatically makes it different. There is nothing special about sex. Violation of trust is violation of trust, whether done through sex or cuddling or conversation, no matter how severe or mild it may seem.

So likewise, either you hold each other to harsh standards in relationship, where even small lies means you are a shitty person, or you realize that every situation depends on the circumstances, which is the overall point Im trying to make.

Thoughts?

And you ARE being ridiculous, and disgusting, you're honestly just as disgusting as op's boyfriend. fuck off cheater

I understand that your personal experience has something to do with your viewpoints, but you really don't need to result to insults. Im just trying to have a conversation. Just because my opinion is different from yours doesn't mean you have to insult me. I overall do not condone cheating, I just think the situation is never black and white like people make it seem. If it was, relationships would be easy for everyone.