At certain point in my life, I was "riding solo" in that I did not have friends nor did I pursue relationships. Many of my good friends from high school went to colleges out of our hometown, while I stayed and went to a local university. At this time, I didn't know how to make friends.

I was lucky in that I met another aspie in college. We weren't aware we were on the spectrum at the time. She went on to pursue her diagnosis and dragged me along for the ride with her - I've been happier and more at peace with myself since.

I'm gay and she is fluid, so our relationship is extremely close without romantic undertones that sometimes bog down male / female relationships. Being friends with someone else on the spectrum has been life-altering. Talking to someone who understands about my issues, and the reciprocal experience of listening to someone talk about their issues, has let me work / date / socialize without melting down.

Being able to tell someone, "so I was completely overstimulated at work and had to take a break" or "I was really unable to read the room and said a few inappropriate things", has allowed me to forgive my shortcomings. It's helped alleviate my loneliness. It's helped me grow as a person. I am comfortable saying that she's a partner for life and that I love her purely platonically.

I have a few friends, starting with her, that I share the same feelings for, but it was really this one that allowed me to safely explore and understand human relationships to the point where I don't have trouble connecting with people. I've always been NT-passing, and I'm even more so now.

This is all to say that while finding that one right friend may be difficult and may take time, the journey is certainly worth the gift. Of course, friendship is not all sunshine and kisses. There's a bit of trial and error involved. Establishing boundaries is messy business. But the prize is largely worth the effort.

My biggest recommendation is, when befriending someone, seek friendship as your ultimate goal, not a romantic relationship. Friendship is a worthy end in itself. Our society tends to fetishize romance to the point where we end up thinking every "relationship" we have needs to be romantic or sexual. Intimacy between friends is as rewarding as intimacy as between lovers.

Good luck!