Sadly its not a " little affection " I'm talking about, even on the second date - he wouldn't let me go with the physical contact and gazing over the course of numerous hours.

Self sabotage is a possibility. I'm fully aware these things are superficial - thats why I hate to admit it, I also really hate myself for thinking about them. I also wonder if I need to somehow stop this focus I have. If so....how I can do that. You're right you can spend forever pullling anyone apart. But also I guess on the flipside... these little things do factor into our attraction to a person. And when you've met a stranger online these quirks aren't apparent upfront, or even expected.

I wish I wern't having these thoughts.