Do any of us really relate to the LGBTQI community? I sure don't!

You're speaking for a lot of people about an experience that is specific to you. It's true that many bi people experience feeling unwelcome or detached from the lgbtq+ community, usually because we're perceived as not gay enough, but you can't speak for every bisexual man when you say this.

As for the using 'homo sex to joke around', I'd imagine the reason gay people don't find it funny is because you are essentially making fun of them in a way similar to many homophobes. Honestly, I think you need to look at this from their perspective to understand better why many gay people don't appreciate your humour. The idea that there isn't very many lgbtq+ people who like the things that you do just implies that you've been looking in the wrong places and have essentially created this idea in your head about what all lgbtq+ people are like which does not truly represent the diversity of the group.

You can absolutely believe that the 'pink purple baby blue hippie stuff' isn't for you, but at least try to recognise the reasons for it. One of which is the erasure and invisibility of the community, which may in fact be one of the reasons you do not relate to it. Bisexuality was so absent from the media when I was growing up that I first heard the word on The Jeremy Kyle Show when I was 11, and if you've seen the show you'll know the kind of impression that made about the kinds of people bisexuals are. When I came out to my dad, 7 years later, he didn't know what it was and after I explained it he essentially told me to pick a side. I get in some ways why you don't feel like part of the lgbtq+ community, but in my experience I also don't feel more comfortable being a part of the straight community. Both are guilty of have stereotypes and prejudices about bisexuals, but I believe that the lgbtq+ community can relate to the experiences of rejection and coming out.

As for bi people being more heteronormative and binary than queer, I disagree. It honestly just seems, to me at least, like you've surrounded yourself with people who are this way and have adopted that mindset yourself. Everything you said seems to imply that the lgbtq+ community is not masculine enough for you. Perhaps it isn't the gay community that is the issue, perhaps it is that you don't feel secure in your masculinity unless you are in an environment that expects you to be manly and masculine, rather than one that is open to all kinds of expression of identity and personality. Everything you said has basically implied this.

/r/bisexual Thread