I feel that way about getting high. In college I used to get high all day every day. I quit when it stopped being fun and no longer made me feel creative, but anxious and overwhelmed. I don't think it was the weed, I think it was my life. However now that I never get high I always get scared when I'm in a social situation where we all get high, because I just feel like I sound stupid because such little amounts take such a huge toll on me. it's not that it isn't fun or interesting to be high, I just feel like the experience is so intense for me and for all my stoner friends it's just another day in the life. so I look like an idiot because i'm like woah, and they're just trying to feel normal. I have anxiety about being the only lame human who's high as shit off of two bowls. I feel like everything I say sounds idiotic. However also by myself, when I am not feeling the pressure of other people's judgement, I still get scared because I can hardly handle myself sober let alone with a sense of intense high life speculation. I usually just end up fighting to fall asleep, telling myself i'll feel normal when I wake up. It's so crazy because I used to smoke so much every day that I feel dumb not being able to handle such small amounts of weed these days, like cmon pull yourself together man. It feels like I've taken ten steps back. But I do get very scared, not like you though where i'm scared of the process of becoming high or the medical side effects, those things have never been a problem for me sober or high except maybe when trying an intense drug for the first time. I think you're maybe overthinking a lot of things, that once experienced would be disappointingly less intense than you're afraid of. What is scary to me is not what it started out as, sure I've had some god awful mornings after a night of heavy drinking where I wanted to die because of all the stupid overly honest shit I said or did. but what's scary about these things, I don't think is a health issue, but a bringing to light of things you overall try to suppress in your subconscious. TBH. for me at least. idk.