i started watching her back when she was with destiny in florida. i was starting my own wEigHT lOSs JoURnEy and somehow she showed up in my recommendations, so i started watching. she was also "trying" to lose weight and said she had binge eating disorder, which i also have. i didn't have anyone in real life going through the same things as i was so at first watching someone struggle with the same issues i had was encouraging.

theeeeen it became clear she really wasn't trying to lose weight or work on her "eating disorder." it honestly became too triggering for me to watch, so i peaced out shortly after they moved to kentucky.

i kind of forgot about her until kickinggeese started doing her reactions, because i've been subbed to her forever. i was in a much better place with my own ED recovery + weight loss (around 160 elbees down so far, while amber has probably gained that much since i found her...) so i started watching again through reaction channels. for me, i can't say it's boring despite her being so predictable. she's such a train wreck i can't even feel bad for her anymore. she's unfortunately an excellent example of what happens when you let your "mental things is scary" control your life, which is something i need a reminder of every now and then. maybe that makes me a shitty person, but she's an adult voluntarily putting herself on the internet and no one in her life seems that concerned, so if she's going to treat her dire straits as entertainment, so will i.