I can relate. I grew up similarly to you (if anything, a bit less wealthy, barely went on vacation and only ever had one family car to give you an idea), and when I met my now- ex, things were awesome at first. She was smart, hard working, and constantly looking for new things like a dance or play or wine tasting. Awesome, right?

However, she had (and has) a complete lack of manners. At first, I thought it was just table manners - she would chew with her mouth open and let things fall out of her mouth onto the plate. Seeing how aghast I was, she tried to adapt a bit (even encouraged me to videotape her because she didn't believe she ate ugly), but it never quite went away. It was just a bit embarrassing to bring her to a business event, but something - I thought - I could live with. The next level were her family and friends though - pretty much the same thing, but amplified. Spit on the plate, be loud and obnoxious in restaurants, snipping at the waiter, zero etiquette.. like drinking expensive whiskey throughout dinner and doing shots with it.

What finally did us in was how she saw other people. Basically, everyone had an utility score. She was nice to the ones who could help her, say, professionally, and condescending towards those who couldn't. She was also hard core racist (quote: why do they let the Mexican operate the register?). I realized too late that once my own "utility score" declined, I, too, was now scum of the earth. We had planned to build family; once she decided otherwise she didn't even inform me, she just moved out. No talk, no goodbye. According to her and her friends and family, this was totally normal and expected behavior and I ought not have made a fuss about it.

So that's my story about dating "another class". It's not about money, it's about behavior and treatment of other people. My advise is to make sure your husband's indulgences stop at his table manners, as this is something that can be contained or corrected.