That reminds me of that old safety story back when I was a kid about the high schooler who is having sexual relations with a belt sander after class. Something about the wind from the sander or something. But one time he got too close, and and his sack was ripped open and a testicle was torn out and flung across the room. He ended up tracking it down, putting it back inside and stapling it shut. A week or something later his crotch had swollen up into huge size and they had to take him to ER. I thought it was just a weird story but someone found the actual medical journal entry of this and showed it to me. I freaked out when I found it was real but the part that stuck with me the most for whatever reason was the fact that they said that when he came into the ER the staples were rusty.