Could give few and less fucks about the AOD factor - even though sinse your removal you have taken to quite the little heroine position. You slash away at that monster sweet cheeks.
What I've noted is your behaviour. In prox chat. In your videos. In everything. The constant pandering to the male audience through just enough sprinkling of sexual innuendo. The perpetual desire to have everyone like you - up until they catch you out on your broken need for love. Your longing to control at least a fraction of the world around you. All this pushing for training and bettering peoples lives and their game lives and thew gaming world around you might seem noble to some but you and I both fucking know that it's entirely about you and your need to have something in your life that you control.
Fuck. Look at the different interactions with different people. You almost insist on making each and every one of them feel special. Playing them in every interaction in some ploy to make them feel like they are the only ones you care about, and you are the only ones they should care about, listen to. Your goals and ideas and wants getting the lions share of their attention and efforts.
It seems like the second AOD went against that you whined and moaned. And when that got squashed, you had a hissy fit and not lash out like they raped you or shit on a puppy. Maybe they were shitty to you in the end, maybe they weren't. A big girl who doesn't need this constant adoration and control would shake it the fuck off and move on and grow better. You just move on to a better set of pawns. Increasingly more gullible playdough brained hacks. I wonder if any of them realize that you are saying all the same things to each and every one of them. That you've flirted your way into their minds and don't care about them individually but what they represent on your trophy shelf - "and here are all the people that like me."
Do I have a low image of women? No. I have a low image of broken people who manipulate their situation instead of dealing with their issues. Do I have a poor image of weak males? Well, yes. I have a weak image of anyone who fails for simple ploys and is used like a subway napkin. I judge people that treat clearly constructed, fake and forced social contracts to fill the voids of meaning in their lives. Some of these people are grown men, with lives and families. Sure we all want an escape sometimes. But drooling over your virtual ass is just pathetic.
Part of me is actually sad for you. About you. I watched a bunch of drunk op's videos - or the Gream slurs and tries to seem awesome and fun hour. You constantly START the video's extremely intoxicated, more so than everyone else. Half of them have no idea what's going on which leads me to think you've been sitting there drinking and waiting for your thralls to fall into place for some attention time. It's worrisome.
You might want to curtail the drinking. But hey, my family is riddled with alcoholism so what the fuck do I know right.
Stereotypes and archetypes exists because they fucking exist. So don't give me any shit about seeing just what I want. I simply see what is fucking there. To much of your behavior is 100% gamer girl that panders for attention and love.
As I sit back and watch you change and manipulate people I've known for some time I gather more and more data, be it anecdotal it still shows what you really are. The game set aside, you are a broken strange little person. It's sad. Part of me help to go your way. Part of me knows you don't want help. Perfectly comfortable atop your throne of lies and teased hearts.
This is heftier then expected so I'll wrap it up. I don't hate you. Not really. I just wish you and all your drones could be better. I will not sit here and watch you all act so foolishly without shining a bright light on it. You and they are equally as poisonous to not just this gaming community but the world. Maybe one of these morons will read this and turn to look at the picture of his wife - or fuck, his neglected goldfish - and realize just how he's been sucked into this sideways social venus flytrap. Maybe you'll realize that you are legend. You have become the monster. The emotional vampire. Feeding off others at any expense.