I might be asexual. I don't know how to define my situation. Incoming wall of text:

I don't find any aspect of naked people to be sexually attractive. Doesn't matter male or female, supermodel or average person - I have never seen a naked person that makes me sexually excited. I don't mind being naked or being around naked people in a non-sexual environment (nude beach, hot tub, etc). But I really don't like seeing people have sex (in porn or RL), and I don't enjoy doing it myself. I even get uncomfortable during sex scenes in movies, and usually look away.

I spent age 13-26 or so just fapping to furry porn online, and didn't seek out any real life sexual activity. It didn't interest me and I was focused on other things in my life. I started a successful business, made a lot of money, did a lot of travelling, etc.

Then, about four years ago, I met my mate and moved cities to live with him. We clicked in every way - similar sense of humour, approach to problems, oddball interests and ideas, etc. We get along super well, really enjoy each others company, intimacy (cuddles), and definitely love each other a ton.

But I don't find him sexually attractive. Not specifically him, it's just that I don't find anyone sexually attractive. I find him amazingly attractive as a person, lover and life partner - and I still want to spent my foreseeable life with him, but I can't make sex work reliably.

If I can get into the right headspace, we can have sex - but its super hard for me to do. I essentially have to close my eyes, try my best to ignore what's going on, and imagine I'm in a different situation. I can't do that easily, and can't at all under pressure.

Right now we have an open relationship, which I fully support (he has needs that I want to see fulfilled!), but there's still a big pressure on me to figure out my sexual hangups. I've brought up the idea that I might not be into RL sex, but my mate has made it clear that's not an option.

With my mate's encouragement I've started slowly getting into RL sexual attraction, but so far only heavy petting through certain clothing (fursuits, spandex etc) and so far only with novel encounters (new people at cons and such). It's a step in the right direction, but I still get super squicked by most things, and have yet to find a way to make regular sex something bearable, let alone enjoyable.

I'm still working on it though and I have high hopes we will figure something out.

tl;dr maybe asexual, maybe exclusive fetish, but similar challenges.