Author and savior of several marriages offers a helpful suggestion on the nature of cheating

Nope and also no. Emotional abuse a lot of times goes undetected, I noticed that a man's wife would say something to him that would hurt him and she wouldn't do it out of malice, she didn't even know about that, and the man isn't going to speak up so he keeps bottling it inside. He has to understand that he needs to be assertive and tell her that every time she does X or says Y, it greatly upsets him and ask her to stop. A lot of times the abuser is baffled that she's been doing it, again, we only think of ourselves as amazing and flawless human beings, everyone gets incredibly defensive when a flaw is pointed out.

It's about actually being able to be totally open about aspects that are usually omitted for being "edgy, taboo or dark", such as your fantasies, fetishes, seemingly ludicrous dreams and aspirations, thoughts on various issues, etc... and not feel judged for thinking a certain way or believing a certain thing.

Now, if the person does not respect you or does not want to WORK WITH you, then, yes, you should exit the relationship, but relationships will NEVER be perfect. Someone will eventually make a mistake (NEWSFLASH!) the answer can't just be to throw it all away at the first mistake (there are levels to it, obviously. If your wife killed the neighbor, I wouldn't recommend staying with her for example...)

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