I was an illegitimate child nearly 60 years ago. I didn’t know who my real father was until about a month ago. He had passed away from I found out who he is from a 1st cousin. This was dna. They didn’t know about me. I got lucky with who I contacted because the majority of the family are a bit stuck up and not comfortable with them (Norwegian) having babies that are not pure. I’m not hiding from them. Filling in everything I find. Thank you 23 and me. After 44 years spent trying to figure out who my father was, I found out in 3 weeks, from order to results. I agree with the above. Do the dna and just leave it out there. They can’t deny the reality. Good luck. :)