So I tried even harder to be a nice guy
no, stop right there. Being a nice guy is the path or least resistance. You can not argue you tried "falling" or "failing" it is literally effortless. What you did try is manipulate from a position of weakness.
I am a nice guy, and I want to date a little to see what this dating world is all about. Think again good boy
...you suck, you are a raw deal. It's not the women, it's you, you can only give money and a roof to a woman. And for that you ask for sex, affection and to be emotionally supportive. Not even hookers would settle for a deal like that in the long run. Try junkies.
Today I am spinning 2 plates, my wife
that is quite a accusation, so you are saying that you can drop her at any moment and there would not be consequences? because that is what plate means.
and my mistress who knows about my wife.
so your wife isn't actually a plate, you are just cheating.
and I know that she won’t be cheating on me anymore, but I also know that with time she’ll pressure me to leave my wife so that she and I can be a legit couple.
not if she can sifon you off, without the whole trouble of getting dragged down in a relationship. She not only is cheating she is telling your sad stories at voffee to her girlfriends. This woman is not your friend, again, NOT A PLATE, she is a emotional tampon that you are heavily invested in.
and I wonder if The Red Pill is indeed the best cure for me depression. And by Red Pill I don’t mean it as a way to bed women, but as a way of life to regain my Masculinity, to live my own life on my own terms.
No, you need cuddles not truth. You are a pathetic man that is so selfish and needy that you killed your manliness long ago just to not interfere with that ego. You are not only incapable of doing the hard things you rationalise your way out of doing the uncomfortable things as well. How can you be such a man pussy and have a job or be a adult for that matter. It's beyond belief.
I honestly don’t know what I am doing with my life, or where my life is headed.
Join the military, you either get killed or you get your bullshit cut away from your personality. Both of which would be improvements.
I know that all my life I have done “the right thing” and it had lead me to a place that sucks
No, you did the easy thing, and guess what, you ended up exactly where you'd think.
Traditional therapy is helping but is not solving much.
because it's you, you need to fix yourself, stop being such a child and expecting external factors to fix your life.
it just makes sense that The red Pill as a philosophy of life is viable for me, and yet I find it hard, very hard to swallow it and to fully integrated it in my life.
You can't, truth can kick you in the face and you'd run away from it because it's hard.
Any suggestions, testimonials, and constructive comments highly appreciated.
No. You have nothing constructive to build on. Your life is filled with bullshit and under it there is nothing. Move away. Get a divorce, say goodbye to the nice lady that replaced your mother and get a new start building wells in Angola, to make something good with your life. From there we can talk about rebuilding yourself, based on achievements, working on more healthy cognitive models, being physically healthy and becoming a valuable person. But I'm afraid you can't even do that you just can't do anything on your own.